The Super Bowl is not only the biggest sporting event of the year, it's also the biggest concert event of the year. The coveted halftime slot is the most-watched musical performance in the world, and past acts have included rock legends like Paul McCartney, Bruce Springsteen, the Rolling Stones, Tom Petty and the Who.

Sadly, recent years have been significantly less rockin'. Last year's halftime performance featured canned-pop-star-turned-terrible-actress Madonna, while this year's big act is Beyonce, fresh off her great lip-synching performance at President Obama's second inauguration. And if that doesn't suck bad enough for you, it's even rumored that Destiny's Child may reunite live for the occasion -- and by "live", we mean "they'll probably lip-synch, too."

We really don't think Beyonce and football's biggest game are the perfect match. If we had our way, this year would feature another great classic rock act and restore the world to its natural order. Here is a list of the Five Bands That Should be Performing at Super Bowl 47 Instead of Beyonce:

Talk about a killer set. Can you just imagine how freakin' awesome it would be to see Axl Rose and company tear it up on classics like 'Paradise City,' 'Welcome to the Jungle' or 'Sweet Child O' Mine' in such a great setting? Yes, perhaps the split-second timing needed to get the show started would be a bit... stressful for some backstage producer, but that's their problem, not ours!

Bob Seger and football are a perfect match. They're both all-American, and Seger made his reputation through his live performances long before he ever started having hit records, so there's no question he could get up there and rock the joint. He's got so many classic songs that would come off great, from up-tempo tracks like 'Hollywood Nights' and 'Katmandu' to slower stadium-ready anthems like 'Mainstreet' and 'We've Got Tonight.' And he'd almost have to close with 'Old Time Rock and Roll' -- which we bet he wouldn't have to lip-synch.

3) Kiss

Gene Simmons publicly slammed the selection of Madonna for last year's Super Bowl, and let's face it, he's right. With their costuming, theatrics and pure rock and roll energy, Kiss -- the world's most visually entertaining rock act -- would be a perfect choice for this gig. And with songs like 'Rock and Roll All Night,' 'Shout It Out Loud' and 'Detroit Rock City' in their arsenal, they could restore some rock and roll glory to the show, too. Are the guys who book this thing in cahoots with the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame or something? C'mon, people -- it's time to do this.

After decades of waiting, Van Halen made rock fans all over the world happy last year with the release of 'A Different Kind of Truth' and a bunch of tour dates -- with more to follow this year. For one of the greatest hard rock acts of the rock era to appear at the Super Bowl would just be the icing on the cake. Think of how epic it would be to watch Van Halen tear through classics like 'Runnin' With the Devil,' 'Panama,' or 'Unchained' in front of the whole world. That would be the group's crowning moment.

Wow. There could be no better band, ever, to grace the stage at the Super Bowl than Led Zeppelin. Fresh off the release of their triumphant 'Celebration Day' concert film, the group's surviving members have demonstrated that they still have both the chops and the unique energy that made them so great in the first place. Now we understand and respect their desire to let that 2007 show stand as their last. But since we're daydreaming anyway, it gives us chills to even think about the mighty Zep dropping 'Kashmir' on a live TV audience, not to mention 'Whole Lotta Love,' 'Rock and Roll' or even 'Communication Breakdown.' That would be a damn sight better than Beyonce, don't you agree?

Of course, the Super Bowl isn't the only big cultural event going on right now. It's also the season for our very own 2013 Ultimate Classic Rock Bowl, which currently finds Rush and Guns N' Roses locked in a championship battle that depends on your votes. And while some may not think it's as prestigious as the Super Bowl (they're just jealous!), at least we can promise you the winners won't perform 'Bootylicious.'


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