Ozzy Osbourne has lined up a handful of book signings to promote his forthcoming book, ‘Trust Me, I’m Dr. Ozzy,’ which hits stores Oct. 11. The jaunt of in-store appearances kicks off that same day in Huntington, Calif., and is scheduled through an Oct. 22 appearance in San Francisco.

‘Trust Me, I’m Dr. Ozzy' is a collection of letters culled from the recurring advice columns that the metal madman has published in The Sunday Times and Rolling Stone magazine. Looking back on his many years of hard living and nearly dying, Osbourne -- who really has no medical training whatsoever -- uses the columns to dispense ridiculous, ludicrous, humorous and occasionally pertinent advice that, as we at Ultimate Classic Rock best put it, "no respectable human being should follow."

Or, as Osbourne himself put it in his first column in The Times: "If people can learn from my stupid mistakes without having to repeat any of them, or if they can take some comfort from the crazy things my family has been through over the years . . . that's more than enough for me. By all accounts, I'm a medical miracle. When I die, I should donate my body to the Natural History Museum."

Meet and greet Osbourne live and in person and get your shiny new copy of 'Dr. Ozzy' signed on the following days in the following cities:

Oct. 11 -- Huntington, Calif.
Oct. 13 -- San Diego, Calif.
Oct. 14 -- Riverside, Calif.
Oct. 15 -- Los Angeles, Calif.
Oct. 18 -- Conroe, Texas
Oct. 19 -- Tucson, Ariz.
Oct. 20 -- Las Vegas, Nev.
Oct. 21 -- Sacramento, Calif.
Oct. 22 -- San Francisco, Calif.